The Awful Dreaded T Word

My personal take on transferring: the good, the bad, and the totally truthful. My first hand experience on the very dreaded T word...


We are allowed to change our hair, our favorite color, our favorite flavor of ice cream.... so why is it so frowned upon to change one of the single biggest decisions of our lives? I remember feeling like, by transferring, I was failing. Why? Why would I feel that if I'm still getting my degree, still taking classes, and still preparing myself for my future, I'm failing and disappointing everyone.


It's the confusing concept society has created to ensure we look as perfect as possible. We aren't able to make mistakes. But we are humans, and frankly, humans often make mistakes. I forget to ask for room on my Starbucks coffee almost every time I order. Sometimes, I go to grab my car key instead of the house key to unlock the house door. It happens. Sometimes, you are too busy thinking about how badly you want to get inside you forget to check and make sure you are using the right key. In a weird way, that's sort of like choosing a college. See, senior year is a blur of confusing emotions and the feeling of needing it all figured out. Some people have it, they've known forever and it would have a better chance of snowing in July in Southern California than their plans going differently, but others, the majority... just don't know. For me at least, college always seemed so far away, like something I could keep putting off but eventually it was right around the corner and I needed to make my decision. I was so excited about moving out of Delaware, I forgot to check and see if I was using the right path to do so. I think that's how it is for a lot of people. I was moving so fast, I forgot to check the key I was using. You are forced to make this life altering decision when you aren't even old enough to legally drink. We are supposed to be trusted with a hundred thousand dollar life investment? And if we get it wrong, we are shunned for choosing wrong the first time? What about what's behind door number 2? Sometimes, door number one isn't always what we thought it was, but the grand thing about college is... We can transfer! What?! Am I actually claiming it's okay to transfer?! Yes... I am. Because it is. It's OKAY to get it wrong the first time.


The real tragedy is the fear that it's not okay, that's when you are really truly failing yourself. When you continue to fill your life with unsuccessful, toxic choices. If you don't love it at the school you swore you would, don't force yourself to stay in order to prove some hypothetical point we have to always be perfect. Take it from me, I was thrown right on my ass when I tried to force it. For anyone reading this saying, "transferring isn't a big deal, no one cares" I have a feeling these people haven't seen the looks on others faces when you admit you are transferring. I'm sorry to admit it folks, but your poker face isn't as bulletproof as you thought and as soon as I muttered the words, "I'm transferring" I saw the initial disappoint in your face. I get it! Trust me, I do, it's not your fault. We automatically assume everyone makes the right choice, and it's disappointing to watch someone openly admit they changed their minds. Unfortunately, I saw this at the highest degree because to others, I was just another failed attempt at a girl trying to escape a small state, and falling victim to missing home. On the outside, I'm sure that's what it looks like, to be honest I would probably assume the same if it wasn't me, but here we are, you are reading this blog, and I am me, so I can't see it that way. I don't owe anyone an explanation, but I will say this, I'm doing what's best for me. To quote the great Jason Derolo, "Finally doing me and it feels so right." So, transferring isn't about failing and getting it wrong, it's about trying again and getting it right. It's okay to transfer, as long as you believe you are happy... that's all that matters (sorry for the cliche, it just fits so nicely.) 



So that was it people. My long winded rant, but partly helpful words, as to why transferring shouldn't be the most dreaded T word we know. Turtlenecks should be. Anyway, for anyone reading this who did transfer, or knows someone who is, trust they know what they are doing and try not to place judgment, people don't always get it right. 



Thanks for reading, hopefully you enjoyed it. More blogs on fashion and the better things in life, like home decor and DIY's are soon to come.

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Until next time!